Lyrics:

Frankie says that he's got vertigo
He says this every time he leaves the pub, blotto.
Backaches, bellyaches, earaches and migrains
Frankie's life is misery and full of aches 'n' pains.

Frankie's got the blues... frankie's neurotic, he's always feeling pig sick
Frankie's got the blues... you will have to excuse, frankie's got the blues

Frankie sneezes once then goes to bed
'I've got double pneumonia' Frankie said
Frankie lives in the doctors surgery
Everytime he has a shave he waits in casualty
(Guitar Bit)

'They say I am a hypercondriac', CONDRIAC CONDRIAC
'But I have got Yellow fever, that's a fact'
A blue bottle landed on Frankie's head, FRANKIE'S HEAD... FRANKIE'S HEAD
'Right, that's it, I've got Malaria I'll soon be dead'.