Lyrics:

When I'm Five
i Will Wash My Face Me Hands All By Myself
when I'm Five
i Will Chew And Spit Tobacco Like My Grandfather Jones
'cause I'm Only Four And Five Is Far Away

when I'm Five
i Will Read The Magazines In Mummy's Drawer
when I'm Five
i Will Walk Behind The Soldiers In The May Day Parade
'cause I'm Only Four And Grown-Ups Walk Too Fast

yesterday Was Horrid Day, 'cause Raymond Kicked My Shin
and Mummy Says If I Am Good, She'll Let Me Go To School In August
daddy Shouted Loud At Mummy And I Dropped My Toast At Breakfast
and I Laughed When Bonzo Licked My Face, Because It Tickled
i Wonder Why My Daddy Cries And How I Wish That I Was Nearly Five

when I'm Five
i Will Catch A Butterfly And Eat It And I Won't Be Sick
when I'm Five
i Will Jump In Puddles, Laugh In Church And Marry My Mum
and I'll Let My Daddy Do The Washing-Up

if I Close One Eye, The People On That Side Can't See Me
i Get Headaches In The Morning And I Rode On Freddie's Tricycle
and Everywhere Was Funny, When I Ran Down To The Sweetshop
then I Fell And Bleeded-Up My Knee And Everybody Soppied Me

i Saw A Photograph Of Jesus And I Asked Him If He'd Make Me Five
i Saw A Photograph Of Jesus And I Asked Him If He'd Make Me Five
when I'm Five
when I'm Five
when I'm Oah