Lyrics:

A spoof of “Ya Got Trouble” from The Music Man
The Monorail Man, Lyle Lanley, dupes the people of Springfield into funding a monorail for the city which turns out to be a decrepit and inoperable mess.
Well, sir, there's nothing on earth like a genuine, bona fide, electrified, six-car monorail!
What'd I say?

Monorail!

What's it called?
Monorail!

That's right!
Monorail!

I hear those things are awfully loud...
It glides as softly as a cloud
Is there a chance the track could bend?

Not on your life, my Hindu friend
What about us brain-dead slobs?
You'll be given cushy jobs
Were you sent here by the devil?
No, good sir, I'm on the level
The ring came off my pudding can
Take my pen knife, my good man
I swear it's Springfield's only choice
Throw up your hands and raise your voice!

Monorail!

What's it called?

Monorail!

Once again...

Monorail!

But Main Street's still all cracked and broken...
Sorry, Mom, the mob has spoken!

Monorail!
Monorail!
Monorail!
Monorail!

Mono...d'oh!