Lyrics:

My mother was a douche bag
My sister was a douche bag
I guess that makes me one too
I got the douche bag blues, yes indeed
I got the douche bag blues
I got the douche bag blues
Lord I don't know what to do

I sold dynamite to the Arabs
Bullets to the Jews
Whiskey to the Indians
And I'll get you too
I got the douche bag blues, yes indeed
I got the douche bag blues
I got the douche bag blues
Lord I just don't know what to do

Vinegar and water
The drink that I choose
I gotta tell ya brother
Tastes like pussy juice

I got the douche bag blues, yes indeed
I got the douche bag blues, oh yeah
I got the douche bag blues
I got the douche bag blues

'Time flies when you're in a coma, you know that?'