Lyrics:

I haven't slept for 10 days, because that would be too long.

How long can a CD be? I might have to do 2 tonight. Nah I'm kidding. That'd be too much comedy... for me.

My apartment is infested with Koala Bears. It's the cutest infestation ever. Way better than cockroaches. When I turn on the light, a bunch of koala bears scatter. And I don't want em to, I'm like, \'Hey hold on fellas. Let me hold one of you. And feed you a leaf.\' Why do koala bears- they're so fucking cute, why do they have to be so far away from me? We need to ship a few over, and I will apprehend one, and hold him, and pet him on the back of his head.

I've always wanted a suitcase handcuffed to my wrist. Alright. That's not a full joke there. That's filler.

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure he did not start to load shit into a truck.

My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana, but I said, \'No, but I want a regular banana later, so yeah.\'

A guy told me he liked cherries... But... I waited to see if he was gonna say tomato... Before I realized he likes cherries just... All right, that joke is ridiculous. That's like a carbon copy of the previous joke but with different ingredients. I don't know what I was trying to pull off there. That one might be edited.

I have a few cavities. I don't call em cavities, I like to call em places to put stuff. Do you know where I can store a pea? Yes I have some locations available.