Lyrics:

If you want you can buy me a bullworker for my birthday
But that doesn't mean necessarily
That you'll end up with Mr Musclehead
A raving stud in your bed
'Cause I'm the greatest that ever lived
I've got so much love and joy to give
So handsome and intelligent
I'm the world's number one suavest gent

But of course I'm not
But of course I'm not
I'm just an idiot
Sweetheart

If you want I'll get my hair cut regularly
But that doesn't mean necessarily
That you'll get Bob Dylan or even Matt Dillon
You get a someone instead of a no one
'Cause I'm the greatest that ever lived
I've got so much love and joy to give
So handsome and intelligent
I'm the world's number one suavest gent

But of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
I'm just an idiot
Sweetheart
Sweetheart
I'm an idiot

So don't think that you will get an apology
'Cause that's the last thing that you'll get out of me
You want a Chippendale, you've got an Airedale
You want a gladiator, I'll see you later
'Cause I'm the greatest that ever lived
Got so much love and joy to give
So handsome and intelligent
I'm the world's number one suavest gent

But of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
I'm just an idiot
Sweetheart
Of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
I'm just an idiot
Of course I'm not
Sweetheart
I'm just an idiot
But of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
Of course I'm not
I'm just an idiot
Just an idiot
Sweetheart

So don't think that you will get an apology