Lyrics:

It would appear that male pattern
Baldness has set in
His hair, at an alarming pace
Running away from his face
He's losing his virility
And now his masculinity
Has been compromised
And his libido down-sized
Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me, you understand
Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God
Thank God instead of me
From what I have been reading
His scalp needs kneading
To stimulate each follicle
And reverse this diabolical
Condition that's afflicted he
For years and has cruelly
Repulsed each potential mate
And left him with a balding pate
Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me, you understand
Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God
Thank God instead of me
Sock it to me baby, yeah

Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me, you understand
Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me, you understand
Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God
Thank God instead of me
Thank God!

Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God
Thank God instead of me
How?