Lyrics:

Demented New York athletes
Staggering round the block
Deforned Chicanos pour in
Chicago's rolling stock

Digital bathrooms drilling for furs
Surgical stockings marked his and hers
Guggenheim attitudes back to back
With Jewish Baroque

No way street
No way street
No way street
Happy to see you, have a nice day!

Defecting Russian dancers
Dance into Hockney prints
Exclusive to Bloomingdales, gift-wrapped in red
From the land of blue rinse

They boggle at menus in Olde English verse
'Ode to a burger' by Keats at his worst
The hissing of omelettes, the breaking of legs
Don't shoot 'till you see the whites of their eggs
The pink fillet mignon looks black on the negs

Strange apparatus
You've never seen
Strange apparatus
Even stranger theme

Street alligators
Big Anglophile
Will navigate us
Through a change of style

I came, I saw, what manner of beast is this?
New York, you talk a little bit left of centre
A scream, a shout
New York is throwing its weight about

Walk tall, walk straight
Spit the world right in the eye
The stronger the wood
The straighter the arrow

Dismembered hopeful My-Lai veterans
Queuing for sleaze
'Sorry, no dogs, no fags, no shriners
And no amputees'

Sexual athlete applies for audition
Willing to make it in any position
Just one of the extras with blood on their faces
In snow-white and the seven basket cases
I'm happy and dopey and dirty in places

No way street
No way street
No way street
Lock up your daughters, Avon crawling!

Devoted collectors of paraphernalia
Out walking the rock
Battle and bitch for the ultimate kitch
Of a crucifix clock

Two miniature romans, running on rails
Appear every hour and bang in the nails
Oh, I've got to have it, Christ
I gotta be the first on our block

Disturbing facts about Nazi splinter groups
Seen on the news
They're picketing synagogues and claiming that Hitler
Was King of the Jews

Caught in the tunnel an ambulance howls
A men's room attendant is flapping his jowls
Ssshh, Howard Johnson is moving his bowels

Strange apparatus
You've never seen
Strange apparatus
Even stranger theme

Street alligators
Big Anglophile
Will navigate us
Through a change of style

Strange apparatus
You've never seen
Strange apparatus
Even stranger theme

Walk tall, walk straight
Spit the world right in the eye
The stronger the wood
The straighter the arrow

No way street
No way street
No way street
No way street

No way street
No way street
No way street
No way street


Thanks to Jan Cremers for correcting this song.