Lyrics:

It's nine o'clock in the Chinese take-away

And I blame the effect on the gamma ray, the gamma ray

Well, losing out on mah jong

I set my watch to Hong Kong

I blame it all on the gamma ray

I hear the triad has crossed the Tong

In Indianapolis, home of the gamma ray

The deadly gamma ray, the deadly gamma ray



And there ain't no guest list tonight at the Memorial Hall

Cher got in cos she's so thin

And even Evil Knievel tried to wheedle

No - the deadly gamma ray, the gamma ray

I blame it all on the gamma ray

Know why, you know why - the gamma ray



I hear there's entry only to those with green hair

In the next World's Fair because of the gamma ray

Yeah, I hear there's panic buying of shampoo

And those little pots of goo

You know why, you know why all because of the gamma ray



When Alan McGhee went to Dundee

He caused all the rock groups to flee

Yeah, I read it in the N.M.E.

It was the gamma ray



The Chief Brigadier's head began to swell

Firing off depleted uranium shells

He bombarded everything pretty well

Except for the gamma ray

Blow it all away



And then the gamma ray seemed to say

If you carry twelve margaritas on a tray

You cannot be touched in anyway

By the benign, yet malevolent

Mark two chrome, gamma, gamma, gamma,

gamma, gamma, gamma, gamma, gamma ray

Gamma, gamma, gamma, gamma ray



So, let's go back to Indianapolis, oh, Indianapolis,

Yeah, Indianapolis, Indianapolis

Let's go back to Indianapolis

Because it's the home of the gamma ray



Sure, I'm gettin' on a train right now

I'm outta here