Lyrics:

One two!

If you ever hear a noise in the night
Your body starts to sweat,
It shakes and shivers in fright
You go and sleep with your mother
She hates you guts
She knows that you love her
So she holds you tight
All through the night in to the broad daylight
And when she doesn't come home
You'll have to sleep alone
Then you wet your bed and I think that's sad
For a girl of 19 it's more than sad, it's obscene!

One Two!

And your girlfriend sweet little 17
She's got her layered hair and her flared jeans
You know what that means, she's just a little queen
She shares your London flat
She thinks that London's where it's at
Although it stinks and when it rains you wear your hat
And your plum coloured pvc wet- look maxi mac
You tie your ginger hair back in a bun
You're the ugliest creature, under the sun!

One Two!
Go!

One Two!

And you think it's about time that you died, and I agree
So you decide on suicide
You tried but you never quite carried it out
You only wanted to die in order to show off
And if you think you're gonna bleed all over me
You're even wronger than you'd normally be
And the only things you want to see are kitsch
And the only thing you want to be is rich
Your little pink up-pointed nose begins twitch
I know you know you're just a little bitch!

One Two!