Lyrics:

One moonlight night in the bayou a silhouette

The air was sweet and the fog was vi-o-let

The gators were all drinking tea, in a dreamy pantsless glee

I saw a suspendered man, a banjo holstered in his hands.

He had biggest red suspenders I ever did see, golly gee that's what I've seen

He flicked the brim of his hat, and this is what he said to me.

\'Mister robut ah am The Suspender Man

And dis banjo 'as shown me dah promised land.

Now ah play a song but in return, yoo put dat shiny coin right 'ere in mah urn.

And ah play yoo sumfin fine. Mah music gonna blow yo mind!\'

So I flicked my coin into his pot, I gotta admit it twasn't a lot

Two cents and then his fingers wriggled,

he plucked those strings and belched a giggle.

He tapped his foot, howled like a hound

Igniting up the unholy sound.



And I ain't never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never,

never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never,

never, never, never, never, never, heard anything so great.



Call the vendors.

Big Suspenders.

That's what everybody wants to wear.

They stretch to Nantucket.

Put them in a bucket

And send them to the gnome trapped down the well

(Tug 'em with thumbs is ideal)

(While rollin' back on your heels)

(Yeah)



He played the two cent show



And just like that he stopped playing

My jaw dropped to the floor.

He cracked his neck and smiled at me,

And said,

\'Buddy, y'gotta pay for more!\'

But by then a crowd had swarmed the swamp,


tossin' coin in after coin.

So he cleared his throat, and his fingers writhed,

and everyone shouted for Suspender Guy.



Call the vendors

Big Suspenders

That's what grandma wants for her birthday

They're bright red and awesome

Even worn by opossums

Nobody wants their pants to fall down

(Ma and Pappy want 'em too)

(Even the ghost of your Uncle Stu)

(Yeah)



He played the two cent show



Fracture dat banjo!



All the children sing and dance

Those banjo sounds instill a trance

By 4 AM the press what hot

Suspender Man on the front page spot

Suspenders were in and spats were out

The girls all suffered from fainting bouts

The banjos flew off the shelves

Sprouting wings with dreams

of being played by Suspender Man.



But in the middle of February

the fog turned a crimson red

The Suspender Man disappeared,

everyone was heels over head

But we found his suspenders and that old banjo

sittin' right there on his log



And though he's gone,

that's what he gets

for selling his soul to the bog



Big Suspenders

Put them in a blender

Three bat teeth and a blackened gypsy eye

Bring it to a boil

Release your mortal coil

Out pops a belt to wear for you and me-

Nobody wants their pants to fall down-

You could wear a dress and then...you'd have no need

(The alligators had it right)

(Wearing pants it sure does bite)

(Yeah)



He played the two cent show